Monday, July 24, 2006

Day Three,8:15PM

  Dinner is over. Tony Romas tonight. We wanted to eat something we did not have to inspect for unidentified objects. We’re tired after a long emotional day today. We spent the morning eating and waiting for Riley to come to the hotel. She arrived around 10:30 and we went with the social workers and other adoptive families to the Central Department Store for a day of shopping with the kids. 

Turns out Riley is a shoe addict just like Lo. 

While yesterday was a pretty emotional day, today was that in spades. Riley was in a foul mood. Mostly I think she is just really frightened. She knows she is leaving the only mother figure she has ever known and the foul mood is just her way of grieving that loss. Anyway, at the department store, any eye contact with either Lo or I resulted in Riley simply throwing temper tantrums in various styles and assorted volume levels. After around 5 or 6 of these, Lo and I were pretty frazzled. Not sure of what we were supposed to do, we just followed her and the social worker around and tried to act normal. Whatever that is at this point!

Just I thought it was a lost cause, I noticed that Riley and the social worker were in the kid shoe department. Riley found a pair of Barbie shoes that she liked and sure enough found the courage to ask me to buy them for her. Even though she would not actually hand them to me, she wanted them bad enough to stop crying for a little while and call me papa. I told Lo later that I always knew that the way to a woman’s heart was through her shoes!

After the department store experience, we went to lunch where I was informed that Riley wanted hot dogs for lunch. That was no problem, but that was the only Western food item on the menu so I ordered fried noodles and chicken in a chili sauce. WOW, it was hot! And it lasted for hours. My lips were on fire for several hours after lunch. But I ate it and oddly enough, I liked it. 

We drove back to the hotel and it was a 15-20 minute drive but Riley was tired from the crying and shopping and fell asleep standing up in the van!

We got back to the hotel soon after lunch and the social workers told us to take Riley to the room and wait for us. We had some paperwork to complete at that time. I picked up Riley and headed for the elevator and listened to the most tortured crying ever. Riley was devastated to be carried by me. Finally she desperately reached out for Lo to carry her. Lo held her for 30 minutes while she cried and screamed. The social worker finally came and Riley ran to her for comfort like she did yesterday. This time though, she told Riley to stay away. It was part of the separation process. This did not go over real well. Riley was not to be denied. Finally she calmed down and we were able to complete the paper work. When that was done, the social worker left and Riley remained with us for another 30 minutes. 30 minutes of crying and weeping. Lo and I prayed for her and tried our best to console her but she just cried that she wanted to go home over and over again. We finally took her down stairs and along with the other families, began saying good by to the kids. In an unguarded moment, I greeted Riley with the traditional Thai greeting Sawadee, what do you know, she promptly returned it and then waved goodbye and said goodbye in English! Well the social worker saw it and decide that we were saying goodbye to early. So we walked outside to the waiting van and there she made Riley say it again. Only this time, she made the little curtsey that goes with the greeting, kissed Lo and I both on the cheek and gave us a little hug. She got in the van, the window opened and she waved goodbye to us until the van pulled away. 

We ran for the hotel room and simply collapsed. The emotional drain was exhausting. We spent the better part of an hour talking about what ifs. You know, what if this and what if that. All things we could not control, so in the end, we went downstairs and ordered a drink. It seemed appropriate in the moment. 

Tomorrow, Riley comes to live with us permanently. We will see what happens then.